Week 39: Massages, pedicures, full moon... Still preggo.

I've started pulling all the tricks out of the bag because this baby is now full term. Feeling large and in charge this week.

So I started this week with a pedicure, massage and I'm still pregnant. 

I'm eating eggplant, spicy thai food, my trusty yoga ball is in the living room. 

At this last appointment, I didn't want my cervix checked. If I knew my cervix was clamped shut, all my hopes of this baby exiting soon would be dashed. 

This is Baby Coates the Second, probably. 

I have made it a point to be more active than normal without overdoing of course. I even thought last night's full moon would have more done something with breaking my water. This is the closest i'll ever live to the ocean and the tides have failed me. 

Alas, the tides and barometric pressure did nothing. 

I am having contractions off and on, but I really believe they aren't doing a thing. I went to the perinatologist this last week and he said baby boy was 7lbs 1oz. We grew a little! I'll take it! 

Cravings: I'm literally eating everything. Accurate depiction of the last week: 

Aversion: NOPE. too busy eating. 

Here's to hoping and praying this baby comes quickly and well as safely. I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and i'm hoping it's the last one!! 

Week 38: A mild panic attack and a new perspective.

Hello.

Writing to you from the 38th week of this pregnancy the blog post with little to no pictures in it.

This week literally has lasted years. I've felt pretty good up until this week. My hips are achy and my anxiety has been through the roof.

I debated on even talking about this because A. I didn't feel great about it. B. I was blaming myself, like good old fashioned mom guilt always does.

Starting at my appointment, my OB told me the baby was measuring small. She didn't say how small, and didn't really tell me much other than, Ok if on the growth scan he is indeed super tiny, we will induce and then walked out of the room. Now at the practice i'm at there are 6 different doctors. I see a different one each week so i'm familiar with all of them just in case they deliver me.

This was ok, until this week. As soon as she walked out of the room, I had a million questions that didn't have any answers yet. ***cue all the anxiety*** I had never met this lady before and now she's telling me something isn't right.

My OB loads all my paperwork online so I can view it anytime I need to. I went to take a gander at how small my baby was measuring. At 37.6, his fundal height was 33 weeks. Now I know fundal heights can be off the more the baby descends in the pelvis.

The first question in my head was, "what in the f*** am I doing wrong?!" I've gained an appropriate amount of weight, I eat right, I am exercising in a way that I've been doing this whole time (aka chasing a two year old).  My OB confirmed it wasn't any of these things, if anything it was most likely a placental issue.

So I see my perinatologist to do a growth scan. I'm not an OB RN so I didn't exactly know what I should be looking for or what questions to ask.

He said the abdomen is measuring 33 weeks, which means his birth weight will be lower. He was measuring 6lbs 4oz at 38 weeks. Which I mean is still pretty good, so I intently focused on this number. What I wasn't focused on was the overall picture. That the horrible thing about anxiety, it's a constant hurdle in your mind. One that sometimes you can't get over right away no matter what anyone tells you.

His femur length 75% and head circumference 95% measured fine.

It took one more OB visit and a Non-stress test to help me get to feeling ok, we're not inducing this baby and he can cook just a little bit longer.

Long story short: Everything is fine. I'm just really ready to meet this baby.

When I write this out, it's really all about perspective. We took Allie to Chik-fil-a for breakfast on Saturday so she could play. I noted there was a dad and his two adorable kids also playing at the play place, so we struck a conversation and he told me his son was a miracle baby (everyone tells you about their children when you're preggo, and I mean everyone). He said his son was born at 23 weeks and 6 days. Everything I was feeling about my baby currently wasn't that bad. He went on to tell us about his journey and that his wife had delivered at the hospital I was delivering at and how great the experience was.

It's funny how situations present themselves. I am a firm believer that God does show you different perspectives when need to see them.

Any who, y'all that was week 38. I'm glad it's over and done with.

Thanks for listening to all my rambles.

Week 37: Nesting has begun.

My two year old is obsessed with my husband's car. Every evening she wants to go hang out in the car. Thanks Los Angeles for all the time she spends in the car during your fabulous traffic hours.

Just look at those skills. Watch out future 16 year old Allie. 

After wrapping things up with work, I have been nesting full go.

Bought all my last minute things. Including the breast pump route. Y'all there are way too many options. Thank goodness insurance likes to cover a little cost. I decided to go against the willow.

The Willow was too expensive and after reading a bunch of reviews, it was super handy to have, but didn't have the power. So I looked into the Spectra pumps. My insurance covered the S2 and S9+, two pumps for the price of one. I had to pay a little bit extra, but you cannot beat the Spectra pumps. They are hospital grade.

They also are compatible with the Fremie collection cups. If your eyes are glazing over, you're clearly not a mom yet or your nipples are useless (men). For those moms to be, check out all of this stuff. I've done quite a bit of research and this stuff holds up.

We also couldn't stand the thought of buying a whole other infant car seat, so we're using Allie's infant seat. It's still within the window of being usable and Chicco is so amazing that we bought a replacement cover for the seat to be more gender neutral. You can find all the replacement parts on the website! It's the perfect way to go. I'm sure this baby will only be in this seat for 6-9 months before being too big and needing to upgrade.

Also, my new child will be sleeping in a pack n' play for the first 6 months or so of his life. So we have one that Allie used, (are you starting to see how amazing it is having baby #2), you already have everything! Well this pack n play desperately needs to be washed. I didn't really think this thing needed washing, but I was wrong. You can go here and find out how you can really deep clean it! I guess I'll give my second child a chance, just in case he's allergic to cat/dog hair.

The hospital bag is for the most part packed and ready to go.

Moms: what did you love putting in your bag?

I am not taking all the sh*t I did last time. I mean you would have thought we were moving in, with all the stuff I brought. I'm literally fitting all my stuff in a backpack and taking an extra pillow. The things you learn from being a first time mom.

I will be bringing all the snacks.
- a change of clothes or two.
-Toiletries
-long iPhone charging cord
-baby clothes, just really a couple onesies and a swaddle. They do provide blankets.
-Lanolin
-make sure the car seat is in the car.

And that's it. I'm pretty sure I brought a makeup bag and a straightener last time. HAHAHAHA I can tell you how many times I opened that bag and used that straightener! ZERO.

On another note, my doctor said she didn't think I would make it all the way to the end of August (due date is the 28th). I swear they tell you those things to make you feel like you can do the last month of your pregnancy. My doctor told me that last pregnancy too. Allie came at 40 weeks, 1 day. Just to spite me.

This week is hot. If you're preggo its always twice as hot, guess who doesn't care about it being hot outside and still wanting to play?

Allie.

She is still in denial about having a sibling. She refuses to read her book about being a big sister. I'm hoping this defiance stage stops before baby gets here, but I don't think it will. Until then we will do all the park days and spending extra time loving on her.

Y'all. I need a new show.

Last time we were in the hospital having Allie, we pretty much binged all of Frasier (Yes, were extremely basic white people) for the 43957489 time.

We desperately need something that is easy to get into and not hard to follow, because we will be sleep deprived (most likely).

On to the obligatory bump pic: Week 37:

It's really turning into a shelf. I put all kinds of things on it.

Cravings: Chocolate. Which is weird because I haven't wanted anything like this, this whole pregnancy. Cold Cereal. Probably because it's a million degrees outside. 

Aversions: Nothing. I'm eating all the foods. 

Weird symptoms this week: lightening pains in the down under region. This baby is slowly dropping.

Until next week! 

Week 36: Of all the love stories there are, ours is my favorite.

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. 

I think it's worth a thousand emotions. Finding someone who can photograph your story for the world to see is truly an incredible thing. 

When I look at this picture I see my life in a still frame. 

Crazy. 

Full of life. 

Holding on by the seat of our pants. 

Love that holds us together. 

I seriously didn't think I would get a second maternity shoot, because I really didn't want the focus to be on me. I didn't want a super artsy shoot. I wanted something that would capture us in the crazy, unpredictable life we have. 

Allie changed our lives in the best possible way. She started us on this journey of parenthood. In the past two years, i've learned more about myself than ever before.

She's taught me patience and love, a much deeper love for myself. Sounds weird when I type it out like that. She taught me that I am more than enough for her.

Being present is the most important thing.

How in the world we got this lucky to be under the Manhattan Beach Pier at 5pm on a Sunday with all kinds of people around with a shot like this?! 

My photographer Danie Henry is amazing. Let me tell you I showed up 15-20 minutes late in the wrong location and she still showed up with a smile on her face, ready to go. When I got to the shoot I was sweaty, hungry and not really feeling that glamourous because of the heat. 

But then we started our shoot. It was comfortable and we just got to be ourselves. She didn't hurry us and she always listened to all my input. Would I go with her again?! 

Yes. 

Mamas in the South Bay area or anywhere in Los Angeles, I would really have you consider her when needing a pictures of your family. Danie is a mama of 5, and totally understands all the obstacles of getting everyone to look at the camera at once. She's is super flexible and just really makes you feel at home. 

A very special thank you to Danie for all your hard work and understanding of my preggo brain. You're amazing and my family thanks you for helping capture us in the most perfect way. 

This outfit made a come back. It was one of my favorite outfits for Allie's shoot. It was one that made me feel like a really pretty preggo lady.

Sometimes, it's weird seeing us in pictures today. I remember of all our pictures over the past 12 years and sometimes it feels like a lifetime ago and how different we were back then.

But then when I look at this little lady, I realize, Yes, we aren't the same, we are much better than I could have ever hoped for. 

We communicate better, we don't sweat the small stuff, and we're all around a better team. 

How did we take pictures in the witching hour of toddler life? Bribery and M&Ms. Lots of M&Ms. 

I cannot describe the love I feel for this baby in this picture. 

There are lots of stages in life that couples go through and I have to say with all the chaos and unknowns, this has been one of my favorites. 

I love you, Matt. Thanks for being on this journey with me. 

A very sappy lovely week indeed. 

Baby Coates the Second, we are absolutely ready to meet you. 

Love, Mama