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Saturday, December 17, 2016

Life in 6 months.

Happening in the life as of recent:

I started writing this blog post October 14. I'm just now finishing it.

I started a new job. I love love love it. It's at a hospital super close to my house, which is absolutely unheard of in California, since everyone commutes. It's on a Telemetry floor and it's night shift, so i'm still trying to figure out the logistics of having a baby and really messed up sleep cycles, which doesn't really make sense, but our girl has been sleeping through the night since 8 weeks. I know, I know ***Cue my lynch mob***.  

But on a serious note, my job is really amazing, I haven't been able to say that since i've been here in LA. It only took nearly 2 years of being here, but better late than never. Since getting out of nursing school, it had been a struggle to even figure out what kind of nurse I wanted to be, and floating from one job to the next was not something I was accustomed to doing. The place I work at now really supports future career goals and i'm so excited to be here for the rest of our time in LA. #bloomwhereyoureplanted

Shout out to peeps at my last job location that put up with my pregnant self, LOVE YOU. Just didn't love the place we worked. 

Another huge shout out to the hubs: for taking care of our daughter at night while i'm working. I have to say, I got really, really lucky with this guy. I never have to worry about a thing. He always knows what to do and is such a great dad. Allie loves him just as much as I do. 

Babies grow up way too fast. No one prepared me for this. 

The past six months have been the most stressful, wonderful time of my entire life. When you sit back and see life from the simplistic view of a baby, your perspective changes dramatically. 

My life is a mess, I don't post updates on time and am consistently late for everything, 6 months ago this would have set my Type A teeth on edge, but I don't let it bother me. Oh how things change. 

You didn't know this was going to be a post of pictures, now did you?! 

We also don't care about the mess and how our living room looks like a child's room/homemade disaster with dog/cat hair everywhere. There is literally toys everywhere. Our house will not look like the inside of a Pottery Barn magazine anytime soon.

This is how my hair looks most days, as well as the dark circles, who cares?! That's what they make concealer and dry shampoo for. Come to think of it, I looked a lot like this before this baby was born too. #ohnursingschool #atleastIhadpractice #optimist

We had our first run in with foods. I cannot tell you how excited I get when this girl eats. It's pure bliss. You can bet my shirt looked like this without the bib! You can imagine those diapers are getting pretty smelly too. 

I am so excited for the holidays this year. There is nothing like spending and viewing Christmas through the eyes of a baby. Kids really do make the holidays that much more magical. 

I can't tell you the next time i'll blog. I know it'll be sporadic and completely random, because we're so busy making memories. 

Until next time! 💖

Monday, December 12, 2016

Boobies vs. Bottles, a Mama struggle.

I've officially been a Mom for six months now. Six months. How in the heck did six months go by?!

For the first month of my daughter, Allie's life, I had no idea what I was doing. When I came home from the hospital the only thing that actually frightened me was feeding her. The most natural thing a mother should be able to do. I was dead set on doing what i'd learned in my breastfeeding class and that would be the best thing for my child. My expectations were very high. 

So I fed my daughter by breast. By the first appointment, my child had lost 14% body weight, a normal anticipated weight loss for newborns within the first week is 10%. 

My first thought in my head was oh no, HOLY SH!T, I've done something wrong. I've been a mother two days and i've failed my child, which is every First Time Mom's worst nightmare.

So I had a lactation consultant come to the house to help almost immediately and we weighed Allie and she had lost more weight. We tried using a nipple shield. That worked temporarily, but by the end of that week, Allie had only gained about an ounce. The nipple shield started rubbing and to say the least my nips were on fire. 

I literally was scared to nurse my child, the pain was unbearable. 

This was a huge problem. On top of being in pain from recovering from delivering a child with a midline episiotomy, sleep deprivation, plummeting hormones and a really hungry, screaming baby,
I had to do something else. 

So I started pumping and supplementing breastmilk by bottle, YIKES. Which I was taught in my breastfeeding class was a really big NO, within the first month. You aren't supposed to introduce a bottle until after a month or until after the little one has latched. Well I was 0 for 2, Allie hadn't latched and she definitely wasn't a month old. I was quickly starting to realize my breastfeeding instructor gave really strict rules that didn't work for me, because remember I was trying to do everything by the book.

SPOILER ALERT: when you have a baby, throw the damn book out the window, it doesn't work for everyone and sometimes you need to do what works for you. 

Overwhelmed doesn't even begin to describe it. However, I knew I had to put my pride aside and do what I could do at the time. Allie didn't end up latching. Ever. In time, Allie started to grow and develop. A whole month went by and I was just exclusively pumping my breastmilk. I felt so guilty. I felt like I was letting my baby down. I cried a lot. I mean I shamed myself so much, my husband would come home and have to pick up the pieces and tell me how ridiculous I was being.

When I look back, what was so wrong with pumping? NOT A DAMN THING. 

I was enjoying my baby and pumping was a pain, but it was working for us and my baby was thriving. 

I felt amazing. 

I fed my baby breastmilk for four months. At about four months, I noticed my milk supply starting to drop. Again, I was faced with another round of good ol' fashioned guilt. You know how hard it is trying to pump during a 12 hour shift is when you're a dayshift nurse on a beyond busy hospital floor? 


I was letting everyone (society/crunchy moms) else get in my head and make me feel shameful for how I was feeding my child. 

I started feeding my child formula and I also started sleeping more. The more sleep I got, the more I was able to wake up and realize how stupid I felt for feeling this way. 

My child is being fed. 

My child is thriving and growing. 

My child is healthy. 

How dare I let anyone make me feel less of a mom for feeding my child the way I needed to. 

Mamas, I have to tell you something right now. It's ok to feed your child formula. Yes, breast milk is without a doubt the best you can give your child, but I think we can all agree that fed is best, no matter how you do it. 

Being a Mom is hard. To the mamas that breastfeed with ease, I applaud you. Will I try my hardest to breastfeed my next baby, sure, but If I can't I will not beat myself up for it.

The Honest Company has an excellent feeding resource page, for moms needing more information about the best options to feed your baby and other excellent products.

Let's change the culture and commit to supporting a Fed is Best mentality.

If anything else, Mama, know you're doing an amazing job.

Until next time. 💗

Friday, October 14, 2016

That time I started blogging again.

Woah. We have to stop meeting like this. It's seriously been a month and a half  TWO months since my last post.

Yes, we are still alive, but incredibly busy.

Fall is obviously in full swing and like every typically white girl, we're definitely on board. All she's missing a #PSL. I cannot even handle all the rolls. My heart explodes a little bit overtime we try to put on pants. 

We spend a lot of time baby wearing these days. It couldn't possibly be because she has separation anxiety. Ok, I have the separation anxiety.

I curse the bacteria that entered this household for the past month. You read that right a month. We literally all had ear infections. Apparently, we like to share infection in our house. 

At least she's super cute when she's sick. I blame daycare, the two days of daycare she went to her first week. I work in a hospital and you would think I would bring home the disease.. nope. 

So going back to work, has got to be one of the hardest things i've ever done. I'm ok once I get there because I'm balls to the wall busy, but before work I'm pretty much a mess. However, now that I work night shift, it's gotten a little better. In the beginning it was pretty rough. 

People would ask, "oh how is the baby" and all I really wanted to do was scream and wonder why I was at work that day.  Oh yes, that's right I need to help pay my massive amount of student loan debt. 

I just keep telling myself I love being a nurse. No, I really do, I just might love being a Mama a teeny bit more. 

Life got exponentially better after she hit about 3 months. She's definitely more predictable and I can plan more for the days that we actually leave the house. 

Like when we hit up sushi joints or hit up Costco. 

But really our new normal is really starting to feel normal. I will say the first couple of months I would just think to myself, "what am I doing?!" and to be honest that thought still crosses my mind, because being a mother is not for the faint of heart. 

This job is seriously the hardest thing i've ever done, the most rewarding, but hardest. I couldn't imagine having two or three at once. Bless the mothers of multiples! 

My new mantra everyday is: 

I have to remember this is good enough, and it doesn't matter how much I think i'm floundering around. 

Things I've noticed about my postpartum self: 

  • I don't second guess what I say out loud anymore. There used to be a small part of me that would hold back if I didn't agree with someone. That's dead and gone. I don't know if it's because i'm tired or just more ballsy these days, but i'll see how far this one takes me. 
  • Sleep is a priority. Sleep has always been important, but after having a kid, it's sometimes the only thing that gets me through the day. 
  • My whole perspective has changed. When they say you put yourself second when you become a mom, it's totally true. 
  • I, all of a sudden feel so much older than the rest of my peers without kids. Is that strange? Maybe it's because i'm a mama bear now, I have no idea. 
  • Mommy brain is real. 
  • I cherish moments a lot more than I used to and am thankful when time can slow down for a minute. 

Until next time! 

Thursday, August 18, 2016

Cancer 0, Katherine 1.

As many people know i'm a Nurse and Health Educator. I take prevention very seriously and can't help but want everyone to know how they can be the healthiest possible.

By doing this, I feel compelled to create awareness whenever I can.

I was contacted by a reader to tell the story of Katherine, a fellow Texan.

Katherine was diagnosed at age 49 with Stage 1 Pleural Mesothelioma and was told she had TWO years to live. Mesothelioma is a cancer caused by asbestos exposure, which for Katherine came from doing wiring work for the Texas Power and Light company in her hometown.

So she didn't give up.

Katherine stayed positive and had her right lung removed - which is a major surgery that requires months of radiation afterward to prevent spread of any cancer.

However, she was in the best hands cancer victims can go to M.D. Anderson Cancer center, which is top rated in the state of Texas for treatment of any type of cancer.

Katherine beat cancer and is 9 years cancer-free against all odds. She gives hope to other mesothelioma victims that can seek help for their condition by reaching out to Patient Advocates at Mesothelioma Lawyer Center. They provided Katherine support and helped her through out her fight against cancer.

According to OSHAAsbestos is a naturally occurring mineral fiber. It was used in numerous building materials and vehicle products for its strength and ability to resist heat and corrosion before its dangerous health effects were discovered. Individual asbestos fibers cannot be seen by the naked eye, which puts workers at an increased risk. The Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA) has regulations to protect workers from the hazards of asbestos.

If you know anyone suffering from Mesothelioma, which in most cases directly related to asbestos exposure, which is illegal in any conditions from any work environment, please reach out to this organization.

BTHO Cancer! (If you're not from Aggieland, BTHO = Beat The Hell Outta Cancer!)

Until the next post!

Monday, August 15, 2016

Life as a new mom and other rants.

Hello. Geez time is flying off the handle these days.

Clearly a whole summer has gone by since i've been on here. Don't worry i'm still alive and so is everyone else.

Life as a new mom is really amazing. I still don't think it's hit me that i'm someone's mom, or that this sweet child will call me Mama.

I'm strange I know. 

My brain is still trying to get re-wired to this new normal for life. I will say that I most days look like this: 

This is the most sleep deprived I've ever been. Ever. Even in nursing school. Nothing compares. You sleep when the baby sleeps and nothing else matters. This little piece of advice is GOLD, ASHLEIGH RUTLAND, YOU'RE AMAZING. 

The first 1-3 weeks were the absolute hardest. I couldn't figure out Allie's cries at first and getting up every 2 hours to nurse was so difficult. After about 2.5 weeks I started to get down a pattern of how we were doing things, I don't dare say a schedule at this point to jinx myself! I think my body just got used to not sleeping as long or as deeply. I will say that every bit of this is worth it as crazy as that sounds. I have always been a planner and I had to tell myself that we couldn't plan for the next day, just taking one day at a time was good enough. 

New Mamas: I started sleep training at about 6 weeks, and it's helped me immensely, I literally get about 8-10 hours of sleep every night. 

I feel like my nipples are going to fall off sometimes. I have been exclusively pumping. My nips proved to be flat and we never got a good latch and when we would get semi-latched it was super painful. So after a lot of crying and disappointment in myself, I came to the realization that I was being ridiculous and the goal is to have a FED baby. She was still getting all my breastmilk, just in a to-go cup.  Let me just tell you, you are NOT less of a mother because you didn't happen to breastfeed the traditional route or at all for that reason. Formula is OK too. I live in hippy-crunchy mom central and have no remorse for my decision at all. 

Going back to work scares me. So I'm about 10 weeks postpartum (how the hell did that happen?!) and the very thought of leaving Allie, makes me so nervous. I have never been attached to anything or anyone like I am to this girl. Now it makes sense why so many Moms stay at home. I FINALLY GET IT. However, I do love what I do, being a nurse fulfills me, so I will go back to work, but I know I will feel guilty leaving that sweet little face. 

I've learned is a God send. This website is amazing. I utilize this every single day. New moms check it out, you won't regret it! 

Showering is a thing of the past. Just kidding, uh most days. 

My child spit up on me the other day and didn't even bother changing my shirt. #alltimelow #momstatus

I feel productive brushing my hair/teeth and the first time I put on make up was a month after Allie was born. That was a gold star day for me!

I already have a BIG ol' long list of pet peeves but here are the top three: 

  • People asking me if my baby is a girl with a bow in her hair. Yes, she is a girl. Just frustrating. But then I think about where I live.. So i guess i'll be dealing with that a little while longer. 
  • People creeping up in my stroller to peek at my child. I literally turn my head two centimeters and there is a crazy lady's face in the stroller. UHHHHH. Maybe i'm just a mama bear already, don't like creepers looking at my kid at all, but I don't ever recall doing that to anyone else's kid when I didn't have one. This is one of the biggest reasons I choose to wear my kid in a sling/wrap in public. 
  • So my baby started cooing at the doctor's office, very very loudly. Which I was like OMG this is the most adorable thing ever! Another lady shot me a dirty look that basically said, "shut up".    I couldn't even contain what my face was doing when I looked up at her. 

Life with a baby has really been awesome. As you can see Gizmo has finally gotten used to the idea that this little human isn't leaving. He's been really sweet with her and only comes near her when I'm around. 

Bath time has been so fun. Allie's personality has really come out and she just loves the water. I can't wait to see how her personality continues to unfold. **don't you love our california bathroom?! That green tile is fabulous, stop being jealous***

Mostly our weekends consistent of Netflix binges and hanging out at the house. I am completely and utterly content with these decisions. 

Until the next post y'all. 

Tuesday, June 21, 2016

THE Birth Story.

This is one for the books y'all.

I sit here staring at my sweet little Allie girl, when I absolutely know I should be sleeping, but I can't help but think about this amazing journey and how quickly 12 hours went by and really how fortunate I am that it was only 12 hours.

June 4th had come and gone, and I was a little devastated. Why? Because I wanted my baby here and I was a little bit tired of being pregnant.

But like most babies, they come when they want. Allie had her own agenda.

Sunday, June 5th came and about 2:30am-3am I felt  a lot of random back pain, but I was able to sleep through it. So about 6:45am I woke and had to get up. My goodness, I had terrible pains in my back, but didn't really think anything of it, so I got on my labor ball and started bouncing away.

Progressively, my back pain was actually contractions started becoming more regular and so I started timing them. Some contractions would be 7-10 minutes apart, some would be 4-6 minutes apart.

I knew that if I showed up to Labor and Delivery like this, i'd most likely be sent home. I wasn't ready for that kind of rejection!

So at about 8am, I woke up Matt. I was not doing this all by myself. So naturally I sent him out to go get me breakfast. I knew if this was it, I was not going to the hospital hungry! Preggos are cranky enough, don't make them hungry!

So I waited until 9:30am to call the labor and delivery floor to confirm what I already knew, and of course they said to just try wait it out...

11:00am. Either I just peed myself or my water broke. Spoilers: WATER BROKE!

I called L/D to let them know I was on my way and what had happened. At this point, I couldn't speak through any of my contractions and couldn't believe I didn't feel them anywhere else other than my back. I guess I had weird expectations for these contractions.

Poor Matt. We headed to the hospital and I would one minute be ok and the next minute be breathing fire and wanting to murder him. I will tell you, we only live 15 minutes from the hospital, it felt like an eternity to get there. I felt like Matt was the slowest driver on the road and all the traffic in the world got in the way.

11:30am We get to the hospital, I get up to the room and am crying at this point through the contractions. I couldn't believe I couldn't hold it together. The nurse checks me and tells me at best my cervix is 2cm dilated. Holy crap.

I AM IRATE. I am going through all the contractions and nothing?! But then I'm relieved when the nurse tells me that my water did indeed break on it's own and I am being admitted!

WOOOOHOOOOOO! We were going to have a baby today!

Every breathing exercise went out the window. I didn't even attempt to pretend like this wasn't the worst pain I've ever endured in my life. So my nurse, Maureen, called the anethesiologist right away to do an epidural. The best executive decision my nurse made for me. This wasn't in my birth plan, but then again my birth plan pretty much went out the window..

Shoutout to all the women that don't get an epidural. I applaud you. However, I am not a hero.

Getting the epidural wasn't terrible. I didn't focus on anything, but knowing the pain was very temporary. Just as I got the epidural, I began to shake. (I knew for sure that my blood pressure would drop because of a physiologic response) So I just kind of dealt with it and gave Matt the ok to go to the car and get the pillows and all our stuff.

SO while Matt was out of the room. I started feeling really strange. My heart started racing and I couldn't stop shaking, the epidural had taken effect and I was not dealing well. I called the nurse and told her what was going on. Every time she tried to take my blood pressure it was sky high and my oxygen saturation was dropping. Before I knew it the nurse had called a rapid response and I saw the crash cart. HOLY SHIT. I had never been on this side of the crash cart before and made my anxiety sky rocket.

Long story short: I began having a full blown panic attack and turns out i'm super sensitive to pain meds in the epidural and so the Doctor cut the dosage in half. At this point I could move my feet and was feeling much better. No worries, Allie's status was perfectly fine the entire time, which is all I really cared about.

Meanwhile remember how Matt left to get our crap out of the car?!

Matt comes back to the room, and he sees everything going on, and has no idea what is happening. POOR THING. I felt horrible for him. He was filled in and everything was fine.

1:00pm: After I nearly scared my nurse half to death, she checked me and I was 5 cm dilated. THANK YOU JESUS! My body finally got in to gear! I couldn't believe it! It only took me having a panic attack!

We pretty much got the laptop out and watched HGTV the rest of the day. I couldn't sleep, I was just too excited. ** I should have slept. **

4:30pm: My nurse came into check me and I was 7cm dilated! I was definitely having this kid today. ***cue 4832795 different kind of emotions***

6:15pm: I had the sudden urge to bear down, kind of like you're needing to go #2 (Yes, remember you wanted to read this in the first place). My nurse checked me and sure enough, I was 10cm dilated and ready to push. So the next 30 minutes, Maureen coached me through some initial pushing and prepped the room. All could think is, "My kid would try to be born during shift change".

Oh irony.

If you didn't know, everything happens at shift change for nurses. I mean everything.

6:35pm: I'm starting to push with contractions. I continue to push for the next hour.

The doctor finally gets there, you know, to catch the baby.

Let me tell you something:  nothing prepares you to push for labor. Nothing. It's not like you can practice before hand. So I start pushing and continue to do so for the next hour.

7:00pm: My wonderful nurse, Maureen, is giving end of shift report as I feel like i'm dying, because mind you, my epidural is cut in half and i'm starting to feel ALOT. Matt is a champ and not only coaching me (holding one of my legs and telling me I can do it), but witnessing everything he didn't want to. I did get an amazing nurse to replace Maureen and then the charge nurse came in to help and turns out she was the childbirthing class instructor, I was so relieved she was there.

Everyone kept telling me, "omg she's almost here, keep going".  All I could think is, "well where the hell is she?!" "and stop telling me that if she isn't here by next push!!" At the point before she was born I do remember saying just "get this kid out of me". Apparently that was code word for an episiotomy. If you don't know what it is, Google it. Let me tell you kids: that was definitely NOT in the birth plan.

7:24pm: I heard the most wonderful sound in the entire world, a cry, my girl was born.
She was 8lbs, 7oz and 20.5 inches long. Her apgar scores were 9/9. I was thrilled. She was here and healthy as could be.

I just wanted to hold her. I couldn't because I was shaking (I got really cold) and my doctor had started the stitching process and wanted me to wait until she was done. She took forever.
Let me just say i'm not a huge fan of that doctor.

After birth thoughts:
  • OMG. I just birthed an 8 pounder, I was thinking she was 6 or 7 pounds at the most. 
  • Dang she has a lot of hair, now I know why I had all the heartburn. 
  • I really don't like this doctor.
  • I'm ready to hold my girl. 
  • Today at 7:24, I became a mom. 

When I held that girl in my arms, I didn't remember any of what just happened. I just remember all the joy I felt in that moment, to put in to words it's indescribable. All I could think was the wonderful stage of life I'm embarking on and how grateful I am to share it with someone like Matt.

When I looked over at Matt, I saw him for the first time as a dad. It was the most beautiful, amazing thing. He was a natural. I couldn't have picked a better partner for life and I am so proud this man is my child's father. We are so blessed.

Coming through the birth canal is hard. 

Please disregard how tired we look, while our daughter naps. 

Sweet little Allie Cat. 

You've stuck around for nine months reading my rants and rambles of pregnancy. Thank you.
Thank you for everyone who gave me advice and loved me through this part of my life. I will never forget all the support that came from my little corner of the internet.

Much love to everyone.

Wednesday, June 8, 2016

An Open Letter to my dear girl.

Hello my Sweetest Allie Jade,

You don't know it yet, but i'm your crazy mom. I'm so excited for you to be here, you were prayed for a lot by your Dad and I.

Before you decided to make your way in the womb, my life was in a weird place. My career was not in the place I had envisioned and we had just moved to a place that I was sure I wouldn't make home. I had major soul searching to do to figure it all out.

Then there was you. Since you've been growing, I have done more praying and thinking than ever. I have so many things I want to teach and share with you. You made me feel more at home than anything. My perspective changed dramatically and all the silly things I thought before that were so important, no longer mattered. I suddenly had something very tangible to look forward to and you gave me more purpose than I could have imagined.

Thank you for that.

So I do have a few things I want you to know....

I want you to know that nothing in life is fair, sorry darling girl, there will be times you'll want to beat people in the face because they won't work as hard as you, but things will come easier to them.
There will be times you see things on the news that will scare you. There will be times where I can't explain to you why people do things they do. There will be lots of people in your life to help guide you. You will have fabulous teachers who will teach you all kinds of things, and help mold your mind. You will have lots of friends to share wonderful times and create lasting memories with.

You will grow up with people that will love you unconditionally.

If you are ever in doubt remember these things:

  • Praying to God will give you more peace of mind than anything else. 
  • People are more good than bad, there's a lot of love in this world, I know that for sure. 
  • Miracles happen everyday. 
  • Never stop asking why. 
  • Think for yourself, you'll get more out of it than if I tell you. 
  • Find a way to be happy, sometimes you have to create your own sunshine. 
  • The value of a memory is worth more than gold. 
  • Always treat someone who can do nothing for you with kindness. 
  • Always, always take a stand, even if you're standing by yourself. Your ideas matter.  
  • Work hard, this will always pay off, I promise. 
  • Books are wonderful, they can take you places. 
  • Money is not the key to happiness. 
  • Believe in yourself, there will be people that will tell you can't do something. Prove it to yourself you can. 
  • Last but not least, have fun and know that life is full of amazing things you can do, see and feel. 
I could go on and on forever, but I am sure you'll teach me way more than I will teach you. 

I'll love you forever.

I'm so glad you're finally here. 


Friday, June 3, 2016

Week 39: Still pregnant and this is the last day of 39 weeks.

Oh Allie girl, you're giving me a run for my money. If this is any indication how your childhood will be, I'm in big trouble.

So punctuality has never been a strong suit for me. I literally have to leave super early to get anywhere on time. So naturally my offspring won't be any different.

This week has been pretty miserable. I knew I shouldn't have said I was sleeping well in the last post, because now, SLEEPING SUCKS.

I'd like to say i've been having contractions, but I can't. They have been weak Braxton Hicks contractions at best. And my cervix hasn't changed AT ALL. Neat.

So let me tell you something:  having a tilted cervix is not fun. If you have one like mine, getting checked for dilation is less than desirable. Especially when it's so tilted that it points to your backside.  

How is this baby ever going to leave my body?!

So we will wait and see what happens. 

Preggo thoughts: 
  • How many calories do you burn in labor? I wonder if anyone has ever figured that out. Not like I care, but I'd figure it would be as much as running a marathon.  #carbloadingitup
  • I have been getting really irritable in the afternoons. Like hormonal. I've just noticed it this week. Did anyone feel exceptionally emotional at the end?
  • My Greta girl and the cats have been very clingy this week. I hope they know something I don't! 
  • Why can't patience be one of my virtues?!

Until that special day when Allie decides to make her grand entrance, I have some pictures! 

Obligatory Week 39 picture: 

Some of the best pictures: LOVE these angel wings. You can find them in Hermosa Beach, CA!

I can't wait to put these shoes on our girl!

He was such a good sport with these pictures. I'm a lucky girl. 

I hope I feel as serene as this picture soon. I have to remember that sometimes it's not about my timing. This pregnancy really has been a blessing and I have so many things to be thankful for. 

Until next week!!

Sunday, May 29, 2016

Weeks 37/38: Feeling like a fairy in a very pregnant way.

Fancy week 37 picture: I felt a little like a fairy!

I have to stop and tell you about the wonderful photographer that took my maternity pictures. Her name is Hannah Quintana and she is spectacular in every sense of the word. She is a lifestyle photographer and shoots pictures here in Los Angeles, but also travels for her clients. I loved working with her, she put up with all my preggo hormones and is extremely flexible. I never felt like we were rushed throughout the shoot, and she really made me feel beautiful, even though I really felt like I was posing about in a fat suit. 

If you are in the market for any photography needs in the LA area, she's an excellent choice and I cannot tell you how amazing she is. 

Plus, she is an Air Force Veteran and now a fellow military spouse. Seriously, what is not to love about her?! I'm just glad she made her fabulous talent of being a photographer, a full time career!

When you hit the 9th month, you really start thinking of different ways to serve the eviction notice. 

Things to help induce labor that i've read: 
  • Continue to be active... I walk my Greta dog twice a day for about an hour collectively. 
  • Sitting on a yoga ball, I've purchased one. 
  • Eating pineapple... I have read that many women eating pineapple and then going into labor? What is in the pineapple, where this works? I might start eating pineapple next week. 
  • Of course eating spicy food, I have been eating this my entire pregnancy, don't know how true this is. I know it's supposed to release prostaglandins to help labor start. 
  • Yoga poses like Cat/Cow. I have already been doing this for the past couple of weeks, if anything it really helps your lower back that is probably already shot at this point. 
  • Evening Primrose oil ingesting orally. Haven't tried it, but I know with the abundance of hippie stores here, I can find it. 
  • Red Raspberry leaf tea. I actually will try to start drinking this next week. This stuff tones your uterus and helps with the starting of contractions. A lot of women swear by it. 
  • FOOT MASSAGE and really just massage in general. I'm doing this STAT. 
  • Ahem... Doing the Deed. 
  • Nipple stimulation... I actually read that women will start using their breast pump and cause them to go into labor. I don't think i'm crazy enough to try this yet. 
Moms: Anything you swear by?! I'm always so interested to know how people go into labor naturally! 

Week 38: 

I'm convinced this child is just going to burrow into my uterus and never come out. 

I had been having on and off contractions for the past week and let me tell you, there were sometimes when I actually thought this was it. 


I did go to the doctor and she told me I was 2 cm dilated and 60% effaced. UGHHHHHH! 

Well let's just say false contractions don't do a thing for you!

Things i'm tired of people telling me and that I will never tell a preggo ever again: 
  • She will come when she wants/ready. duh. If one more person tells me this, i'm going to lose it. 
  • Maybe you should walk more. Maybe you shut the hell up. I know this. When I walk it feels like a bowling ball is between my legs, it's so uncomfortable. 
These are all mom problems and I should really stop complaining. I'm really glad that Allie is healthy and still thriving, there are so many moms out there that wish they had this situation.

I just really want to love this girl on the outside!


Aversions: Hahaha. I'm eating everything these days. 

Sleep: Still sleeping like a pro, getting in my usual 11 hours. I know how important this is and i'm soaking it all up!

One perk of Allie not making an early appearance, hanging out with this guy! 

Dan has been one of my best friends since I can't even remember when. He made the time to come out and see me and I couldn't be more thrilled. 

They say if you are friends with someone for 7 years, you'll be friends for life. 

I know this will always be true for us.