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Saturday, January 2, 2016

Week 17: Are you sure you're pregnant?

Me: Yes.

A fellow employee: It just doesn't look like it.You claimed you're almost 5 months. Are you eating? Is the baby even growing?

Me: **in my head:  I've already beat you with a chair X 587495873497** Yes.

To this person, I can only claim that they really are as stupid as they look. When you want to ask a pregnant person these type of questions, let me give you some insight: DON'T.

I pretty much have taken everything in stride and honestly this doesn't offend me because some people just don't realize what they've said. I get it. I am however going to start documenting all the weird shit people have asked me. I'll compile it all to post at the end.

Pregnancy Thoughts: A show that I can't believe is still airing is: "I didn't know I was pregnant", and I have one thing to say:  I'm calling bullshit. I've always wondered how this show made it, but Fox threw out The Mindy Project? It still doesn't make sense.

How in the effing hell do you not know you were pregnant?! Did you think that you had to take a giant poop and a baby fell out? Did you think that being nauseous was normal for an extended period of time? How out of touch with your body do you have to be? One word people: Denial.

These are just some random thoughts i've been having, because if i had this much gas on a daily basis, I would think I had some serious GI issues!

Some of these get a little rant-y. Sorry in advance.
  • I bought my first pair of pregnancy leggings which I can't fill out worth anything, but I have them just in case our little peapod wants to have a growth spurt. Which I hope is going to happen soon! 
  • Still don't know what we're having! 16 days!!!! I have had several dreams of carrying around a boy, but who knows, God has a funny sense of humor sometimes. 
  • I LOVE all the preggo advice, typically I'll actually take into account the things family and friends will say, because it is very helpful and they have my best interest at heart. BUT I will tell you some of the things random people have told me just because. 
    • You really shouldn't do an epidural,  I didn't do one and did fine. Do you think you can take the pain? --Lady, I only have one response for you, SHUT THE HELL UP, pain is completely subjective and I will not let you bully me into thinking what I can take and what I can't. How bout I hit you in the face with a chair? Still don't think you need pain meds?
    • Oh you haven't gain a lot of weight, You are going to gain a shit ton of weight, you just wait until your third trimester. --I anticipated the weight gain and still wanted to get pregnant, but thank you for your thoughts asshole. The weight thing is a huge deal for people here in LA, maybe everywhere but I don't remember it being a huge deal with my friends in Charleston. My thoughts are this: IT'S TEMPORARY. I'm growing a human. If I have to gain a little weight to get one of the biggest blessings of my life, i'm going to do it. 
    • You do realize all your dreams are dead and you can't travel anywhere now. This one kind of hit me hard, because I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I have met many, many people that continue their education with children, not to mention travel to many different countries with children all the time. YOU ADJUST. I refuse to use my kids as an excuse of why I can't achieve/do something. Do I still want to be a Nurse Practitioner? Yes. Will it take me a little bit longer? Probably. That doesn't mean I can't do it. There is nothing that fires me up more than someone telling me I can't do something, because up until this point i've proved more than a few people wrong. 
    • One last one: Oh, you're husband is in the military? It's so sad your kids won't grow up with family. HOLD the M*****F****** PHONE. Every single person that has told me this (which is actually more than you'd think), I have politely told to STFU, pretty quick. What people on the outside don't understand, is that your community is very much your family where ever you go. Have you ever heard the phrase, sometimes it take a village to raise a child? This is so true in every sense of the word. I can't tell you the countless times I have been a child's emergency contact at school/daycare, and I have only known the child's parents for a short time. In the military lifestyle, you get very close to the people that you work with, you celebrate holidays together, you support each other during important events such as birthdays, graduations and promotions. This doesn't mean I'm not going home for my family and friends to know my child, this just means I have a different lifestyle and my child will have an extended family and countless people to love on him or her. 

Some stuff you just have to get off your chest, and this is my rant this week, but what I hope is, that some other preggo or mama reads this and knows that people will almost say anything to you, don't take stock into everything people say.

On to other non-ranty things:

Cravings: BLUEBELL ICECREAM. I may or may not have eaten my weight in ice cream while at home. I am only sad I had to leave a pint behind at my in-laws. What you also see below is Whataburger. Pretty much the only thing I get there is a Honey-BBQ Chicken Sandwich with JalapeƱos. I crave both of these items a lot, it's probably a blessing that I don't have these in town, because I know my child would be born with diabetes if I did!

Aversions: Tomatoes, not in salsa. I can eat salsa, I just can't eat tomatoes. I'm a weird bird.

Sleep: I still freak out when I find myself on my back at night. I'm sure I'm not alone in this, as soon as I realize it, I flip to one side. I have found that my Snoogle is an absolute necessity when sleeping. I don't know how I'll ever sleep without it again. I didn't have it in Texas and had the hardest time finding a good spot to sleep.

Ok super tired. Here is the bump photo!

Quick question:

Mamas/Preggos/Anyone: What are some of the crazy things people have said to you?


  1. When I was 20 weeks pregnant with my first, a retired male nurse midwife (the husband of a co-worker) asked me if I was having twins, because I was huge. When I told my mother that I was pregnant with my second, she said "You mean you're like that AGAIN." My children are 4 years apart and I was married. Not sure what the big deal was. BTW, you look fantastic. I love following your progress!

    1. Alex! It's absolutely amazing what people will say, and the craziest part is they just don't realize it. Thank you for your sweet words! <3

  2. When I was significantly pregnant with my second, and we were camping in Texas, some girl I didn't know asked me if I was "keeping it." Excuse me??????


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